In Tydd St Giles, on this autumn day,
We set out on our golfing play,
Though skies were gray and weather foul,
We ventured forth with hearty howl.

Last Friday’s plan was put to rest,
As storms threatened our golfing quest,
Today we took a different road,
To Tydd’s greens, where stories unfold.

With Google Maps as our trusted guide,
We traversed roads where troubles hide,
Down farmer’s paths, through muddy lanes,
We braved the elements, wind and rains.

Reception’s maze, a puzzling tale,
In search of where the Spike Bar hails,
Double doors or singles, we wondered,
Lost in instructions, our minds asunder.

But fear not, for sustenance we found,
A bacon burger, coffee abound,
A morning tee-off, ‘neath the rain,
Les’s plea, “Keep scorecards dry,” our bane.

Soaked through the first hour and more,
Our spirits dampened, but not our core,
Then, the sun broke through the clouds,
As Tydd’s golf course sang aloud.

Dave, from one-forty yards away,
Chipped in for a birdie in splendid display,
Five points earned, a remarkable feat,
A tale to tell, our hearts did beat.

And Sean, with prowess, on the back nine,
Five pars, a score quite divine,
22 points on the return,
A score of which I can only yearn.

On the 18th, in a fateful bind,
Geoff, in the nick of time, Sean’s ball did find,
Two minutes and fifty-nine seconds past,
Two points for Sean, a moment to last.

In the bar, Roy’s miles did amass,
“7.5 miles,” his phone did compass,
Brian quipped, “You missed the fairway wide,”
Roy replied, “Their lost balls, I did find.”

Les and David, Roy they did misplace,
Lost between greens, in that vast space,
Signposts vague, our group’s plight unseen,
Searching for the 14th tee, a tricky scene.

But the day concluded with great delight,
Sausages and mash, a culinary flight,
Raspberry and Vanilla Roulade crowned,
A feast of flavours, our taste buds astound.

Nearest the Pin, David West achieved,
His golfing skill, we all believed,
Now, for the grand finale we await,
Results, scores, secrets of our fate.

The Follies Champion Golfer’s reign,
Will remain unknown, a golfing campaign,
Till the Supper on November’s eve,
We’ll celebrate, and stories weave.

_{With a little help from ChatGPT}

Well it’s another Follies adventure into the countryside(ish) and we find ourselves at Spalding Golf club. Yet again the weather God Les has arranged for a sunny day, but unfortunately he forgot to tell the wind to go home.

Apparently, Legal aid was sought by Kevin Hingle from Geoff Delany at the start – something to do with getting more shots I am led to believe. Kevin’s request was denied by Geoff as the fee offered did not meet the requirement for the amount of work that it would require!!

A good start was not made by Trevor when on the second hole his tee shot went 90 degrees into the river. He did recover with a tee shot to the middle of the fairway and walked off with a six. His group started the round with all three getting the same score (6,6,7) for the first three holes. A similar experience happened with Geoff Delany’s group with (7,7,7).

Jon Kelly’s new £49 chipper/chip putter/whatever it’s called performed very well on its first outing. It chipped in from off the green on one hole, and did its usual job of getting the ball onto the dustbin lid several times early on. Sadly, like its owner, it ran out of gas well before the 18th.

Steve W arrived early and managed 50 balls on the driving range before we started. Dedication to his art, which earned him a 12 on the 8th! Time well spent?

Meanwhile, on the 10th, Gabe used the water in front of the green to skip up onto the green. Geoff Delany chipped in from 50 yards plus on the 11th for 4 points, Trevor almost made a birdie on the 13th with his chip but still walked off with 4 points.

Spalding this time seemed to earn a reputation as a dangerous course, with the following list of fortunately mainly near misses – with the exception of Colin H whose ball on the 5th slammed into a tree at about 8 foot high and then proceeded to slam into Roys’ forehead causing a massive bruise and much concern. Fortunately, Roy felt able to continue and Colin thanked him for the header back onto the fairway.

Other incidents included, Martin Z trying to take out Paul Flanders on the 17th, but Paul’s lightning reflexes saved him. Then the course tried an attempt at revenge as the last group walked off the 18th, a tree fell down between the 1st and the 18th. John Dexter did ask if they followed etiquette and shouted “Fir”.

Les summed it up as a challenging course hence the lower than normal scores. Personally, I would say that it just had too many bleeping trees, and the first cut and some other parts of the course show how good Ramsey has become by comparison. I, for one, doubt if I will return to Spalding.

The final scores on the doors were:-

1st Paul Flanders – 35 pts.

2nd David West – 33 pts.

3rd Paul Bellinger – 30 pts

Nearest the Pin – Roy Fletcher

See you all at Pidley, no sorry correction Tydd St. Giles, on the 20th October.

• Report by Trevor

Jon Kelly in deep thought about his new chipper / putter thing. “At the start of the round I thought this new putter had been a great purchase, now I am not so sure.”

Even John D had to scratch his head for a while wondering how to play this on the 16th.