Whilst the results of the EU referendum was a major talking point for the Follies (particularly the remainees!), the Elton double header was to provide some drama of its own when the club house result had to be changed following a recount!

However Geoff Delaney’s impressive double victory was indeed confirmed meaning that the President’s Cup was not to be snatched away from the home mantlepiece by Robin Watts!  Indeed, it was overheard on the way to the car park that Mr Delaney was particularly excited to be taking home some silverware to his wife who apparently had recently been raising Geoff’s general lack of success on the golfing front. As an aside, I think Mrs Delaney could have an unknown skill in providing motivational speeches to unsuccessful golfers…business opportunity perhaps?

With current Follies champion Robin Watts making an impressive first showing of the season, the recount meant both Les and Colin ‘playing with his new clubs’ Keal had to give back golf balls (although Colin was none the wiser having left early to catch a flight!). Results were as follows:

1st Geoff Delaney (33 points)

2nd Robin Watts (32 points)

3rd Colin Keal (30 points)

Note: No-one made the green to win “nearest the pin” but the committee has agreed to a roll over; what this actually means is presently unknown but it sounds impressive!

The prowling guest journalist unearthed a few gems to share with one of the best being Geoff Liscoe’s casual admission that he picked up his ball on the first (a Follies record perhaps?) and Graeme Phipps playing two (and sometimes three) balls off the tee for 4 holes in succession (another Follies record perhaps?).  The latter performance actually resulted in Geoff and Les offering golfing tips on how to find the driver’s erogenous zone; something to do with raising an important tool of the trade!!!!!

The last grouping may also have made a Follies record in that they all admitted that they may have fallen an hour behind the group ahead!  This apparently arising due to a number of factors namely David West losing three balls on the 14th, David losing his club and the group then having to let through the Elton seniors captain!  David left early!

Finally with the EU referendum in mind, the society members are requested to cast their vote on whether some new attire should become part of the official range of Follies clothing.  The members were impressed with the pink salmon shorts worn by Brian Bates and a suitable pair has been tracked down from a reputable designer outlet.  As with EU rules a simple majority will win the day and to ensure that there is no manoeuvering behind the scenes to change the outcome from the “I would never be seen dead in a pair of those” minority, the committee will ensure they are proudly worn with immediate effect.

Remember bulk buying results in good discounts; so NIMBY’s there is always an upside!

Shock! Horror! Follies day begins in the rain. We’re so used to Les sorting everything including the weather that it’s a bit unsettling to turn up with the windscreen wipers on full and having to shuffle quickly from car to clubhouse.

Some found it difficult to get into the door of the bar as there seemed to be a code needed but no keypad visible. Could a recently thriving business have hit hard times? CK’s ears pricked up.  Eventually a member turned up and his key fob opened the door and we were in.

Bacon Baps (with some brown sauce) seemed to be the order of the day and suitably fuelled, we headed out into the rain.

A drop of water aside, 11 Follies turned up eager to take whatever Ramsey Golf and Bowls Club could throw at us as we chased the 2016 Champion Golfer prize and all that is associated with it.

CK struggled on the tee. No, I mean really struggled – his contact lenses were playing up, his tee peg was going into the ground at an angle and he couldn’t get the ball to stay on the tee long enough to hit it.  After some adjustment, the struggle was over – and he hit some lovely drives dead straight and a long, long way.

The rain stopped after an hour or so and the rest of the afternoon was very nice. JK learned that gimmes have to be counted when marking your score and TC’s ability to find a ball was astounding his partners – could there be a bit of retriever in his DNA?

As quick as the second group played, the third group seemed to spend a long time waiting on the tee / halfway up the fairway:

It’s been noticed that when Graeme Phipps does well, he leaves early (presumably to rush home and tell the family) and this was another such occasion. Despite only scoring 10 points on the front nine using his driver, he changed to his hybrid and scored an impressive 26 on the back.  On two par 3s, he missed the green but chipped in both times!

Graham T also scored 36 points but lost on countback – you get nothing for a consistent 18 points out and in.

3rd was CK on 35 points with at least 4 putts sliding past by no more than an inch.

John Wakefield took the Nearest The Pin prize.

Report by JK

What strange memories we have, Rutland Water always seems to conjure up visions of flooded greens and being soaked to the skin. Not last year and not this.  Cool it may have been, windy it may have been but the weather was dry.

So was the course, some of the greens were so dry and sandy they wouldn’t have been out of place in the Sahara.

The golf.  It was never going to be a high scoring day, like Sleaford, and that was borne out with Martin Zebedee coming home the winner with a creditable 34 points, followed by John Wakefield with 32 points and David Carter in third place with 30 points on count back from Trevor Chapman.

Congratulations to Martin, John and David.

Nearest the pin on the 12th was won by Colin Humphries. Well done Colin.

But why “the circus comes to town”? That’s all down to the last four having rounds to be remembered.  Geoff Liscoe lost sight of his trolley as it went off for a drive on its own for all of 200 yards desperate to get to the next green.

David West employed the Barnes Wallis principle on the nearest the pin 12th, bouncing his ball off the water, on to the bank and then on to the green – tremendous fluke, I mean shot.

Colin K and David C had tried this principle on earlier holes but failed miserably – their balls went sub aqua (under water for those that don’t speak Latin).

There’s more. David C seemed to have lost his ball off the tee on the 11th but it miraculously reappeared further down the fairway being played by someone else. The sinner shall remain nameless but he was one of the last four. Ironically David C  was the sinner last year.

Thanks to all those who waited patiently for the fabulous four to finish and be regaled with their trials and tribulations.

Les picked an excellent day for the first outing of the season. He was a welcome sight on the course, and was easy to spot on the course in his bright red jumper. He was surprised to see most of us practising before teeing off.

Dave West went shopping with his wife in the morning, and met David Carter’s wife on her own. Is Dave West the helpful husband? Or was he only allowed to play golf if he helped with the shopping first?
In addition, Dave is obviously not interested in the Shirtie Photo competition as he left his in the locker room, until retrieved by a fellow Follie.

It was nice to see David Oliver back with us, and he made an early bid for bloomer of the year when on the 6th tee he hit a magnificent drive over the 7th tee. He had asked where the green was and this was pointed out to him as the group in front was on the green, however the first group was also on the 7th green, so he had aimed for them.

Les however made a better bid for bloomer of the year when announcing the results, gave third place to Gabe 37 points and presented him with a ball. He then gave 2nd place to Geoff Delaney 39 points. (Everyone knew Graeme Phipps had won on 41 points, as he had to leave early), Geoff then asked about Trevor who had 40 points. Les went as bright red as his jumper, checked the cards, and took Gabe’s ball back.

Therefore the correct results are:-
1st Graeme Phipps 41
2nd Trevor Chapman 40
3rd Geoff Delaney 39

Nearest The Pin Kevin Hingle
Report by MZ

Results of the End of Season Follies Texas Scramble:

1st – John Wakefield, David West, Brian Bates and Graeme Phipps  Net 67.60

2nd –  Martin Zebedee, Colin Keal and Jon Kelly 70.64

3rd –  Andrew Bramwell, Geoff Liscoe and Robin Watts, 73.63

4th – David Carter, Colin Humphries and Roy Fletcher 75.10

Nearest Pins:
2nd hole – David West
15th hole – Graeme Phipps

2015 Champion Golfer – Robin Watts

Champion Robin

The weather was once again arranged by Les to be excellent, sun, little wind and shirt sleeves at times.
Everybody I spoke to enjoyed the course which was in very good condition.
Brian Bates liked the bunkers so much that he used three of them to advance up the 13th fairway and he enjoyed the one at the side of the 8th green playing four shots to get out. He was getting used to his first new set of clubs after 16 years playing (especially his sand wedge} and his driving was an improvement.
John Wakefield was frustrated on occasions and threw his club away three times but like a true golfer picked it up and carried on.
The results for the day were:
Nearest the pin Trevor Chapman
First with 33 points Colin Humphries
Second with 31 points Colin Keal
Third with 29 points Roy Fletcher

Report by CH.

Legal Eagle soars at rainy Rutland County Golf Club

Twelve brave warriors turned up in very wet conditions at Rutland County for the latest leg in ‘The Race to The Cuckoo’.

The usual banter was evident in the clubhouse before proceedings commenced. Indeed John Wakefield had kindly brought in a copy of the local newspaper which had a picture of a long haired lout 40 years ago in a football team picture. Suffice to say the lout in question was now a member of FF!!

Just prior to playing I had a quick chat with Geoff D (legal eagle) who mentioned he did not feel great and was not looking forward to getting wet!!

And so onto the main event, I only have one unusual moment to report.

My partners Robin (B’stard) Watts and Roy Fletcher and I had just reached the par three thirteenth, when we saw Geoff (focused) Liscoe marching back toward the tee with a thunderous look in his eyes. We were all a bit worried and assumed he had lost his ball. Oh no, he had lost his scorecard and was wondering if we had found it!!!

In terms of the prizes, as the headline suggests our very own legal eagle Mr Geoff Delaney was first with 36 points, the lout was second on 35 and Mr Brian (Wonga) Bates was third with a very respectable 33 points.

Unfortunately no-one hit the green on the nearest the pin hole!! Maybe double the prize at the year-end finale??

Congratulations to all that turned up bearing in mind the conditions and I am sure all will agree that RCGC was in very good condition and was also very welcoming.

Report by CK