Les has been sporting his Shirt out East in Bangkok

Jon gets the year going with the Shirt saving lives in Sydney

At last! Our 2024 season finally got underway at Ramsey Golf Club (Friday 28th April) after the cancellation of Matchday 1 at Sleaford due to waterlogging. We saw 17 golfers eager to tee off, all united in their silent intent of laying down a decent score to avoid the end-of-season wooden spoon award!

A very warm welcome was extended to our new members Terry Barber and Charlie Johnson, who carded very credible scores and were extremely amiable company.

The weather couldn’t quite make up its mind at the start: cool overcast, light brief showers, warm sun. This baffled the final group (Colin, Dave, Terry, Jim) who danced their own version of the Hokey Cokey (wet weather gear on/off/on etc and brollies up/down/up etc) before they started. Fortunately for all, by the turn most of us had disrobed slightly and dry conditions prevailed to the end.

The course played surprisingly well in spite of the Spring deluge. Fairways were running fair, bunkers well raked and playable though the greens were a little slow, catching out your reporter repeatedly! BASH them uphill!

Our apparent tradition of a high quota of members’ tee shots off the 1st succumbing to the trees on the left, and the vicar’s garden, was continued. Not to be outdone, although Messrs Daley and Tooke’s drives boomed down the middle of the fairway their seconds were to follow suit, and inevitably 2 blobs followed!

Good golf was witnessed by all, with 9 players recording 30+ points. Our star performer was Paul Flanders who made a clean sweep of the honours. On his way to carding a splendid 85 (nett 68) for 38 Stapleford he also scooped ‘nearest the pin’ 13th with a fine shot to 25’. Well done, and an obligatory handicap review is underway! Paul’s 38 points with 3 birdies is all the more noteworthy given he had bagged only 5 points by hole 4, before the after burners came on. Inexplicably he declined a sleeve of balls for a bottle of gin!

Second place went to Alan Wensak with 35 Stapleford. Third place was a close run thing between Sean Melia and Les Wells, both with 34 points, with Sean taking it on countback.

Particular mention of Terry who didn’t need his putter on the ‘nearest the pin’ having lobbed in from 35 yards! ‘Get in the hole’ and ‘Way to go’, as our American cousins are fond of saying.

Trees may be the bane of a golfer’s otherwise perfect round (and other things) but our final grouping proved the power of talking to your ball in flight, since all, with one exception, popped out onto fairways after striking wood. The exception being Jim’s thunderous heave left off the 10th that was unexpectedly found by Colin walking down the right hand side rough. Some 90 degree ricochet! Continuing praise of Colin, we know he is your ideal playing partner. Apart from being affable and amiable, his eyesight is 20/20, evidenced by finding your scribe’s balls on numerous occasions in the most hidden of places!

The only dark cloud on an otherwise pleasant day was seeing brown sauce applied by some to their bacon butties! One for the Etiquette Committee to rule on, please!

1st Paul Flanders – 38 pts.

2nd Alan Wensak – 35 pts.

3rd Sean Melia – 34 pts. (on countback)

Nearest the Pin – Paul Flanders

Our next outing is at Stoke Rochford on Friday 17th May (13:25 tee off) where shorts and sun cream are confidently predicted in use. FYI Richard Cheng was triumphant here last year with 37 points.

(Jim Daley match reporter)

Texas Scramble result from Elton Furze in November:

1st 61.40 Gabe Stokes, Andy McHattie, Paul Flanders & David West

2nd 64.3 Jon Kelly, Brian Bates, Jim Daley & Les Wells

3rd 64.5 Colin Humphreys, Trevor Chapman Martin Zebedee & Colin Keal

4th 67 Andy Izod, Dave Ballard, John Dexter & Alan Wensak

5th 67.2 Steve Walker, Roy Fletcher, Geoff Delany & Sean Melia

Nearest The Pin

2nd Hole Colin Keal

5th Hole Andy Izod

15th Hole John Dexter

12th Hole David West

Jim Daley put up a bottle of Port for starting and finishing with the same ball and “not in your pocket.”

3 managed it – Les Wells, Geoff Delany and Andy Izod with Geoff winning after a draw

The Shirtie 2023 was won by Chris Munro

See you all in March for the first outing and a date for your diary:

Friday 8th November 2024 – Fritz Follies Golf Society Annual Supper and Prize Giving 2024

Our Chairman and Secretary Les Wells hands the Fritz Follies Champion Golfer trophy to Colin Humphries. A splendid total of 116 saw Colin clear of Darren Pears, Graham Tooke and Martin Zebedee who all finished with 113.

A great end-of-season Supper was held with 22 in attendance:

Texas Scramble and other results will follow in due course.

“When in China do as the Chinese do”– so Chris did!

He went and walked along The Great Wall.

First photo is early in the walk, and he eventually reached the final accessible tower which is over the horizon top left in the second picture .

And he’s got the medal to prove it!

The Chinese characters are a famous quote from Chairman Mao which translates roughly as “To become a True Man first you must climb The Great Wall”.

Now has he done enough to win The Shirtie to complete the collection?

In Tydd St Giles, on this autumn day,
We set out on our golfing play,
Though skies were gray and weather foul,
We ventured forth with hearty howl.

Last Friday’s plan was put to rest,
As storms threatened our golfing quest,
Today we took a different road,
To Tydd’s greens, where stories unfold.

With Google Maps as our trusted guide,
We traversed roads where troubles hide,
Down farmer’s paths, through muddy lanes,
We braved the elements, wind and rains.

Reception’s maze, a puzzling tale,
In search of where the Spike Bar hails,
Double doors or singles, we wondered,
Lost in instructions, our minds asunder.

But fear not, for sustenance we found,
A bacon burger, coffee abound,
A morning tee-off, ‘neath the rain,
Les’s plea, “Keep scorecards dry,” our bane.

Soaked through the first hour and more,
Our spirits dampened, but not our core,
Then, the sun broke through the clouds,
As Tydd’s golf course sang aloud.

Dave, from one-forty yards away,
Chipped in for a birdie in splendid display,
Five points earned, a remarkable feat,
A tale to tell, our hearts did beat.

And Sean, with prowess, on the back nine,
Five pars, a score quite divine,
22 points on the return,
A score of which I can only yearn.

On the 18th, in a fateful bind,
Geoff, in the nick of time, Sean’s ball did find,
Two minutes and fifty-nine seconds past,
Two points for Sean, a moment to last.

In the bar, Roy’s miles did amass,
“7.5 miles,” his phone did compass,
Brian quipped, “You missed the fairway wide,”
Roy replied, “Their lost balls, I did find.”

Les and David, Roy they did misplace,
Lost between greens, in that vast space,
Signposts vague, our group’s plight unseen,
Searching for the 14th tee, a tricky scene.

But the day concluded with great delight,
Sausages and mash, a culinary flight,
Raspberry and Vanilla Roulade crowned,
A feast of flavours, our taste buds astound.

Nearest the Pin, David West achieved,
His golfing skill, we all believed,
Now, for the grand finale we await,
Results, scores, secrets of our fate.

The Follies Champion Golfer’s reign,
Will remain unknown, a golfing campaign,
Till the Supper on November’s eve,
We’ll celebrate, and stories weave.

_{With a little help from ChatGPT}

Well it’s another Follies adventure into the countryside(ish) and we find ourselves at Spalding Golf club. Yet again the weather God Les has arranged for a sunny day, but unfortunately he forgot to tell the wind to go home.

Apparently, Legal aid was sought by Kevin Hingle from Geoff Delany at the start – something to do with getting more shots I am led to believe. Kevin’s request was denied by Geoff as the fee offered did not meet the requirement for the amount of work that it would require!!

A good start was not made by Trevor when on the second hole his tee shot went 90 degrees into the river. He did recover with a tee shot to the middle of the fairway and walked off with a six. His group started the round with all three getting the same score (6,6,7) for the first three holes. A similar experience happened with Geoff Delany’s group with (7,7,7).

Jon Kelly’s new £49 chipper/chip putter/whatever it’s called performed very well on its first outing. It chipped in from off the green on one hole, and did its usual job of getting the ball onto the dustbin lid several times early on. Sadly, like its owner, it ran out of gas well before the 18th.

Steve W arrived early and managed 50 balls on the driving range before we started. Dedication to his art, which earned him a 12 on the 8th! Time well spent?

Meanwhile, on the 10th, Gabe used the water in front of the green to skip up onto the green. Geoff Delany chipped in from 50 yards plus on the 11th for 4 points, Trevor almost made a birdie on the 13th with his chip but still walked off with 4 points.

Spalding this time seemed to earn a reputation as a dangerous course, with the following list of fortunately mainly near misses – with the exception of Colin H whose ball on the 5th slammed into a tree at about 8 foot high and then proceeded to slam into Roys’ forehead causing a massive bruise and much concern. Fortunately, Roy felt able to continue and Colin thanked him for the header back onto the fairway.

Other incidents included, Martin Z trying to take out Paul Flanders on the 17th, but Paul’s lightning reflexes saved him. Then the course tried an attempt at revenge as the last group walked off the 18th, a tree fell down between the 1st and the 18th. John Dexter did ask if they followed etiquette and shouted “Fir”.

Les summed it up as a challenging course hence the lower than normal scores. Personally, I would say that it just had too many bleeping trees, and the first cut and some other parts of the course show how good Ramsey has become by comparison. I, for one, doubt if I will return to Spalding.

The final scores on the doors were:-

1st Paul Flanders – 35 pts.

2nd David West – 33 pts.

3rd Paul Bellinger – 30 pts

Nearest the Pin – Roy Fletcher

See you all at Pidley, no sorry correction Tydd St. Giles, on the 20th October.

• Report by Trevor

Jon Kelly in deep thought about his new chipper / putter thing. “At the start of the round I thought this new putter had been a great purchase, now I am not so sure.”

Even John D had to scratch his head for a while wondering how to play this on the 16th.

On what felt like the hottest day of the year 19 players turned up at Woolfox, 18 of whom had the sole agenda to catch Paul Flanders at the top of the leaderboard, and by the end of the day many participants will have left very happy with what they had achieved.

After welcoming newcomer Andy Izod and scoffing down a tasty bacon roll with a cup of coffee, players headed out into the afternoon heat, a number then opting to put up their umbrellas to create some shade from the early afternoon sun.

A nervy start on the first saw only 7 players manage to hit the fairway, and a special mention goes out to Roy who managed to hit his drive straight into a 20 square foot fenced off enclosure to the right – surely that warrants an end of season award!

Thereafter players started to relax and put in some sterling performances despite the fact that the tram lines on the greens sometimes appeared to be wider than the grass that was left; Paul Bellinger chipped in on the 6th for 5 points that ultimately led to a Woolfox victory, although John Dexter will be kicking himself until the end of the season for taking 8 on the 18th as he was only 1 point behind Paul once the final scores were counted up.

By no means Trevor’s best performance of the season, but he hit a lovely drive to win the nearest the pin prize, although he did not quite match the hole in one that Les had achieved earlier in the week at Elton Furze – congratulations to both Les and Trevor.

After a long and hot afternoon it was back to the clubhouse, well actually the driving range, for a well deserved cold drink. The scores were calculated and the presentation ceremony commenced. For the first time in the last 10 years 6 players achieved 40 points or more, one of whom was Andy Izod with a very creditable 41 points (I assume Les has already worked out how much Andy’s handicap will be cut for the next outing!)

Paul Bellinger came first with an excellent 43 points.

Colin H opened up a 3 point lead at the top of the leaderboard with 42 points, just nicking 2nd place from John D on the count back system.

The next meeting is scheduled for the Friday 6th October at Spalding, so get practising as Colin H won this event last season with 38 points and is now odds on favourite to regain the Follies trophy, particularly as his current score of 116 hasn’t been matched since 2014 when Colin H last won the trophy.

Darren Pears (Match Reporter)